A dark shadow descended over Rox. It seemed attached to a pair of enormous trotters. His eyes moved up and up and up until, way in the distance, they met a pair of sunglasses, which were studiously ignoring him.
‘’Ere John, you’re in my sun.’ Rox shouted.
The head rotated downwards as the glassed turned their attention to the little rock man. The snout sniffed a deep inhalation of scent.
‘I’m going to need you to move. I could be covered in moss in seconds, the slightest bit of shade and its five o’clock shadow all over.’ Rox said, conversationally.
The pig took a length of straw from the pocket of his overcoat and began to chew.
‘That’s a filthy habit. You want to give that up. Why don’t you go over there and think about it?’ Rox glared at the stranger’s kneecap. Bending down, the Pig picked Rox up by his head to get a better look. ‘Hey, put me down you big pork pie! What do ya think ya doing?’ Rox wriggled angrily. Porkio chewed on his straw.
‘I am looking for someone,’ he said eventually.
‘If the someone you’re looking for is trouble you overgrown sausage, then you’ve found him!’ Rock fists swung at the snout missing completely.
‘Do you think we should help him?’ Anaya whispered to Ceun as they watched the scene.
‘You want to help someone? There won’t be anything in it for you.’ Ceun said pettily.
Anaya feigned shock. ‘It hardly seems fair. I thought you were all about helping the little guy. And for the record, will you just get over yourself already.’
‘Ah, so what you mean is you’re looking for a fight?’ Ceun said, arching an eyebrow.
The morph smiled. ‘Of course not. I just thought perhaps you’d been playing the good guy so long you’ve forgotten what it’s like to have a good scrap.’
‘You want me to get into the fight?’ He added.
‘If you insist. Who am I to stand in your way?’ She said, extending an arm as an invitation to join the fray.
‘Who indeed. But I think I might sit this one out.’ Ceun said, crossing his arms.
Rox’s body was swaying dangerously from side to side.
‘Do you want to think about that because I’m reasonably sure that the neck is supposed to hold the head on the body, not the other way around.
‘I am looking for a human. You will tell me where he is.’ The pig said.
‘I will tell you nothing, treacle.’ Rox grunted. Finally, the crack gave way, and the Pig was left holding just a head. The body rolled twice before performing a perfect back lift and landing on its knees. It immediately began hurling pebbles in the general direction of the pig. ‘That’s it! You got 'im a corker there, right on the snout! Get ‘im!’
Porkio shook his head in irritation. Still grasping Rox’s head he charged at the stone man’s body, knocking it flying. As it flailed, a great trotter stamped down upon the little body causing it to break up into torso, arms and legs. His attention turned back to the head. ‘You will…’ He began before the barrage started again. This time, the arms held one leg like a bat. The other leg used the torso as a platform to launch stones, which were thwacked accurately at the pig. ‘Don’t like it, do ya drippin’ breath? There is no human here, but you can be sure I wouldn’t tell ya even if there was. Go ahead smash me up some more. I can do some real damage once you turn me into grit, ever got grit in your eye… I will drive you insane.’ Rox goaded.
A sneer passed the pigs mouth. ‘I don’t think you know anything. Perhaps I should smash you up anyway.’
‘Go for it, you overgrown… chop… Even if I’m dust, I will irritate you until you can stand it no more, everything you eat, I’ll be in there, and once I get in your stomach… oh, momma, we’re going to have us a party!’
Porkio snorted. Dropping Rox’s head in disgust, he kicked it under a bush. Even after he’d walked away, Rox was still shouting. ‘Come back here you coward. Come on, what are you going to do to me? Nuffin’ that’s what!’
~~
‘Help me gather up the bits.’ Ceun was busily piling what remained of Rox into a pile of rocks.
‘You could have helped him, what about defending the weak and all that stuff you’re supposed to believe in?’ Anaya picked up the little silent head and placed it on the top. She blinked, she could have sworn it winked at her.
‘Defending the weak yes, but when criminals fight between themselves, then there is one less of them to have to take in.’
‘Who are you calling a criminal John? And watch what you’re doing wiv them, they’s bits I’m fond of.’ Both Anaya and Ceun looked at the pile which had recently been Rox, with Ceun rapidly dropping the two large pebbles he held in his hand.
‘If the lichen fits? How long is your rap sheet at the moment? Few breaking up and entering? Bit of bodily assault, your body being the one doing the assaulting?’ Ceun said, wiping the palm of his hand down his trouser leg.
‘I’ve done my time Hawke.’ The pebbles and rocks were gradually moving around, pilling up and assembling until they reanimated as the stone man.
‘Another one of your fan club Ceun?’ Anaya smiled sweetly. ‘Oh, I think you may have that on the wrong way around.’
Rox looked at his right arm and after flexing his elbow somewhere in the region of his buttocks, did concur that things weren’t quite right. ‘Thanks, Doll.’ He said as the arm reassembled correctly. ‘I did ten years of hard labour.’ Rox continued.
‘Breaking rocks?’ Anaya asked sympathetically.
‘No, being the rock that was broken as it happens, I used to be seven foot two.’ He said with a solemn expression which dissolved immediately at Anaya’s look of horror. ‘I'm only pulling your leg Doll.’ He said with a wink. ‘But I bear Mr Hawke no ill-feeling, made me what I am today. He did me a favour. In the security business now. Straight as a die. I’m a self-made man.’ He glanced up to see if the morph would notice the pun.
‘Very funny.’ she said.
‘So what was with your friend?’ Ceun asked.
‘No friend of mine. Shady character and no mistake. One of the faces I reckon, am I right or am I right?’
‘Is he right?’ Anaya asked. ‘What’s a face?’
‘Porkio, otherwise known as the bacon slicer. Morphean Mafia… nasty piece of work.’ Ceun supplied.
‘Tole ya. A proper face.’ Rox said nodding.
‘Now what would he want here?’ Ceun looked pointedly at the rock man. ‘From you?’
Rox inspected his fingers. ‘Sure I can’t say.’
‘You can’t say or you won’t?’ Ceun asked.
‘Don’t know anything, John, you’re barking up the wrong wossname.’ Rox replied as he swapped two fingers on his right hand.
Ceun was staring at the archway.
‘Nothing to see there.’ Rox said.
He took a couple of steps forward, resting a hand against the stone. ‘So it’s not the entrance to a pan-dimensional portal, all of which were outlawed years ago?’
‘You’re right there. It’s not.’ Rox said, none too subtly moving between Ceun and the gap.
‘So it’s been deactivated and is now completely dormant?’ Ceun said, stepping to the side.
‘Weeeeel… not exactly dormant, not if I’m being completely honest.’ The stone man said, sucking air through his teeth.
‘And when have you ever been that Rox?’ Ceun said with a snort.
‘Now fairs fair. Violence and a bit of redistribution of wealth perhaps, but I’ve never been dishonest!’ Rox said, holding out his hands in entreaty.
Ceun smiled. ‘I apologise.’ Ceun said with a bow of the head, ‘So, if say, you saw someone coming this way, perhaps someone from Realitas. And, if just, for example, they happened to be hiding in this, not exactly a portal, you couldn’t, in all honesty, deny it?’ Rox scratched his head as he considered the question, his face contorting in thought.
‘It’s not a portal.’ He concluded.
‘But the rest would be somewhere near the truth?’ Ceun prompted.
‘You’re confusing him.’ Anya said accusingly.
Indecision was etched all Rox’s face. ‘I don’t want to get involved.’
‘Look Rox, the bacon slicer is looking for this man, and who knows who else.’ Ceun said. ‘You’re not doing him any favours by keeping quiet.’
‘There were soldiers here earlier.’ Rox volunteered in an attempt to change the subject.
‘When?’ Anaya asked, glancing over her shoulder.
‘I noticed them coming and made myself scarce, you know, like just another pebble on the beach.’ Winking at Anaya, he continued, ‘When I opened my eyes they were running past like all the bats in hell were behind them, that was just before your man came along... oh bugger!’
Ceun grinned.
‘Where is he now?’ Anaya asked.
‘Now how about a date and maybe I’ll tell ya, beautiful? ’
Anaya rolled her eyes. ‘How about I take up where the pig left off?’ She said.
‘I like a woman with grit.’ He said.
‘Oh, for goodness sake. Of course, you don’t, no man does!’ Anaya scoffed.
‘Touchy ain't she?’ Rox said nudging Ceun’s knee.
‘You don’t know the half of it.’ Ceun replied, shaking his head.
‘Listen.’ Anaya interrupted. ‘This human is being hunted, and not by him for a change. We are probably his best shot. You’d prefer someone else got to him first?’
Rox scoffed. ‘You’re the law’s trained monkey. You’ll just turn him in any way. A nice big fat reward is there?’
‘He’s gone freelance.’ Anaya said. ‘Hey, I don’t suppose there is a bounty in this?’ She said, turning to the bounty hunter.
‘No bounty.’ Ceun was getting impatient. ‘Is he in there or isn’t he?’
‘Search me, treacle.’ Rox said with a shrug. It was against his nature to be too helpful to the authorities.
Ceun was still looking at the portal. ‘So if we go in here, we won’t find anyone remotely human.’
Rox answered completely honestly. ‘You could find anything, John. You could find anything.’
Comments